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Latest Surrogacy News
Paul Redd-Butterfield and Tony Butterfield - Gay dads
In Salt Lake County, 640 same-sex couples are raising
children. An estimated 30 percent of gay male couples in
Utah are raising children, the third highest percentage
in the country.
June 20, 2004
Salt
Lake Tribune
Tony
and Paul once feared that accepting their homosexuality
would require sacrificing dreams of fatherhood.
"When you realize what that means, it scares you," said
Tony, who grew up in a large, loving family.
But the dream is now
reality, made possible by changes in social acceptance
and science.
Tony and Paul met at a
family and friends gathering at the old Stonewall Center
on 900 East in Salt Lake City.
"My mom actually set us
up," said Tony, who was 18 at the time. "We went on our
first date, and that was it. We never dated anyone
else."
After three years, they
had a commitment ceremony. A few years later, they began
thinking about building a family. They considered
adoption, but under Utah law that would have required
elaborate lies or setting up separate households --
neither acceptable.
So the couple turned to an
out-of-state surrogacy center. Two years ago, Tony and
Paul welcomed Liam and Luke into the world.
"Being a father has been
such a rewarding experience," said Paul, 35, who is the
stay-at-home parent while Tony, 30, finishes a doctorate
in chemical engineering at the University of Utah.
"Seeing the kids every day, waking up to their faces,
you can't ask for anything better."
Tony and Paul live close
to their extended families in Sandy. Despite Utah's
conservative makeup, they've encountered little bigotry
or bias. But strangers often draw the wrong conclusions
when they see the men in public with their toddlers,
assuming Tony and Paul have left their wives at home.
"We've come to the
decision that now is the time to let [people] know there
are families like ours out there," said Tony. "We just
say 'No, these children have two dads' or something like
that."
For now, the dads are
tackling the typical toddler issues.
"They've just barely
started little fights over toys and stuff like that,"
Paul said. "Our new role is teaching them how to be nice
to each other, to be civil. It seems to be working."
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